Friday, December 31, 2010

My Grown Up Christmas/New Years Wish List

New Years..A time of year when people reflect back with great nostalgia on the events that have circumvented their life. It's a time when one stops and reminisces both with joy and sometimes sadness, over the happenings of the last year of this so-called thing known as life. What is it about this time of year that produces something within us that feels it necessary to make changes, more so than any other time of the year. What is it that stops us dead in our tracks and makes us think of the many blessings we have, as well as the piles of changes we feel necessary to make in order to "better" ourselves? Well, don't expect me to open the floodgates of wisdom, I'm just a voice hiding behind a keyboard, banging away some lingering thoughts. But, I did some reflecting of my own about 2010 and came up with my own grown up Christmas and New Years wishes. They are just some of my dreams and changes I would love to see in the world and myself. Without any rhyme or reason and not in any particular or edited order, here are the first things that came to my mind:

1. I wish that the 147,000,000 orphans in the world would be adopted and no longer feel the sting of being fatherless
2. I wish that we would let go of our expectations of what we think our lives should look like and see the beauty of letting God map things out-even and especially if He changes plans radically, as He often does.
3. I wish that we would learn to love each other, really and truly love each other.
4. Given number 3, I wish that we would learn to love without expectation, particularly of perfection or of anyone being able to love or know you as only God can.
5. In addition to 3 and 4, I wish that we would love people who can't love us in return and have absolutely nothing to give us.
6. I wish that Christians would reflect Christ in a loving way and not a legalistic, self-promoting, "I have a better walk than you" way.
7. In consideration of number 6, I wish that Christians would recognize the beauty and cost of the cross in which Christ died on, and live a life of surrender and obedience that reflects the relentless grace in which we were freely and with great love, given.
8. I wish that people would laugh more. The kind of laugh that comes from the heart and makes your sides ache from the extent of laughing you've done!
9. I wish that families would be healed and lives be restored.
10. I wish that we would deal with the past, heal any and all pain we have both suffered and caused and move on, knowing that life is short and the only person you are hurting by avoiding it, is you.
11. Upon reflection of number 10, I wish that no matter how much time has passed, we would recognize the value of simply saying to someone, "I'm sorry" and actually meaning it from the heart.
12. I wish that we would look to the poor and needy, with eyes of love instead of eyes of judgement or apathy.
13. I wish that 10% would not be a standard of tithing or giving and that when we consider those in need, we wouldn't just give them old and used things.
14. I wish that people would learn to really communicate with each other and respect each other enough to say both the hard and the good things; that pride would not be a factor of how we deal with each other.
15. I wish that hunger, AIDS, poverty, selfishness and greed would become obsolete.
16. I wish that people would keep in touch with each better.
17. I wish that people would say the word love when it counts and not as a closing to a text or an email to everyone you know.
18. I wish that we would eat more real food and less fake, boxed, processed, zero nutritional value, food. As well as exercise regularly and treat our bodies as God intended-throughout the whole year and not just after the first of every year.
19. I wish that Amos Lee and Ray Lamontagne would hold a private concert just for me. :)
20. I wish that people would stop waiting for the perfect time to take a dream vacation, or to burn that special candle and just do it; today is as perfect as any.
21. I wish more people would live the faith they claim and step out in BOLDNESS for God.
22. I wish we would stop making excuses.
23. I wish we would sometimes, inexplicably, and without explanation, live as children and do spontaneous, and maybe for some, completely out of character things.
24. Reflecting on 23, I wish more of us would be adults and handle our relationships, finances, jobs, lives with responsibility; understanding that there are consequences that come with our actions.
25. I wish we would dream big and believe in ourselves enough to get up and go live those dreams.
26. I wish that the world would come to know Christ for the beautiful, amazing, life-changing gift that He is to us and follow Him with every ounce of our being.
27. I wish that we would meet people where they are and be willing to stand by them through the difficult journey of change, with love and patience, instead of a critical and harsh spirit.
28. I wish that we would learn when to stay and when to gracefully walk away.
29. I wish that I will be able to feel the sand between my toes and the sun both rise and set over the Fijian Islands, and SOON!
30. I wish we would stop wishing..and by the grace of God, make things come true.

Happy New Year! May God open our eyes and our hearts to more of Him in 2011!

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Why Africa?

It is not uncommon for people to ask why you go on short term mission trips. It's not even uncommon for people to snarl or crinkle their nose and say things like "what about the people in the US who have needs" or "why not just send them money" or my personal all-time favorite "I think it's awesome that you do that, I could never do that." It is my favorite because prior to my first trip, I thought the same way, only I thought I would NEVER do that-not that I couldn't. I don't say that from a critical spirit, and while I can understand where those questions come from, recently someone flat out asked me "why Africa?" This one was different. This one struck a cord with  me and quite frankly, I wanted to know why also. At the time, I brushed it off and didn't think much about it, until one restless, non-sleep filled night, as I laid in bed, tossing and turning, frustrated that I couldn't hit the off button on my mind and send myself into deep sleep, the question popped into my head "why Africa?" What is it about this place that keeps your heart and mind so consumed? So, I started pondering that question in the early hours of the morning..and this is what I came up with.


There are a hundreds of places, literally, that are in desperate need and some of them are as close as your own backyard, while some are as far around the world as one could travel. I didn't pick up a globe one day, spin it around, and plant my finger on the first place it stopped. I didn't drop a few countries in a hat and select it bingo style. I've traveled and done mission work in other countries and my love for them is no different than my love for the people of Africa; anymore than my love for any of Gods people is or should be. While I can remember always having a certain intrigue and interest in Africa, the truth is, I didn't choose Africa, Africa choose me, and long before I ever stepped foot on its soil. The politically correct Christian-ese answer might be "I believe God gives us all, individually, particular inclinations towards certain things." And while I absolutely believe that is true, that is not what draws me back time and again to Africa.


The people, the children-I think they they took one look at me, and they knew. They knew I would never be able to shake the red dirt off my feet. They knew that the sound of the African drum would forever resound in my mind. They knew I would look deep into their beautiful charcoal eyes and see beauty, wonder and hope. They knew I would gaze at the smiles of countless orphans and I would see myself. And that when I did, I would never be able to turn my eyes back toward a life that was dead-set on self-fulfilling motives.


Even with those realizations, I kept thinking and searching my heart for something a little more deep, tying my heart to Africa. As I continued to toss and turn, it came to me. Despite the amount of suffering and need that I have been witness to, I see a joy that far surpasses anything you can begin to imagine. While in some places they have grave need, absolutely, and no one would deny that, they find contentment in the simplest of things. They do not measure life in terms of what they do or don't have, but rather give thanks for their daily bread. And most often, in their case, it truly is just their daily bread


One of the things I cherish most about the people of Africa is their abundant generosity. A bracelet, a shirt, a meal, their last chicken, they would give it all to you, just to show you honor and thank you for being a part of their lives. Western visitors innately want to refuse gifts, because deep down you know it may be the only possession they own, but you don't, you shouldn't, because it would shatter them. To them, giving isn't a mathematical equation. There's no 10% calculation, no -let me fetch some old clothes, toys or leftovers for you, or let me see what I have left. No, to them, it is the way of their heart. Give first, think second.  They have shown me what it means to truly live sacrificially and that there is nothing on this earth more valuable than serving each other humbly.


More so, I cherish their uncanny ability to face the gravest of circumstances with a smile that could melt the polar ice caps and a hug, that could warm the hardest of hearts. And when they worship God, they REALLY worship God, as if He really is God and not a cosmic magician, or lamp-rubbing genie. Their faith is strong because God truly is all they have to look to, they are not clouded by possessions or distractions. They teach me so much more than I think I could ever teach them, and words cannot do justice to the amount of love and respect I have for them...


No, I didn't choose Africa. Africa choose me.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

The Prosecution Rests

Criticism: 
a : the act of criticizing usually unfavorably criticism;
b : a critical observation or remark criticism;


Criticism. Despite my attempts to conceal my disdain for the way that some things are done, particularly in the Christian realm, sometimes I fail miserably. For the most part I keep things, particularly thoughts, to myself. But being passionate as I am, sometimes it is difficult to conceal those thoughts. It is hard to look at the world we live in, seeing the utter chaos and brokenness that exists-even in the church, and just sit back and smile. Passion has always been the driving force behind my pursuits, and it's spectacularly difficult for me to sit still when it's ingrained in me to do quite the opposite. So it becomes easy to then say, I know something can be done, because I've been a part of or seen others do it and criticize those who do nothing. Particularly those who preach, teach, disciple, know and understand fully what the Bible says about our brothers and sisters (not strangers) in need.
On the whole, I have to face the facts, I think we are missing the mark on a lot of things, myself included. We have hundreds of millions of orphans, hunger beyond human comprehension, homelessness at an alarming and all-time high, HIV spreading, millions of people who still have yet to hear the gospel of Christ -all the while passing the task on to everyone else. Love is not a calling, it is an action, a verb. And none who call themselves Christians are exempt.
But, lately, God has put this sort of bell in my head that rings when I realize that instead of inspiring, or encouraging people to give, go, or serve, I am instead being critical. I'm mature enough to admit it and to freely express the tendancy I yield to more often than I would like to admit. God is so clear about love being the answer, grace being the motivation, not guilt nor criticism. It wasn't until I saw it rear its ugly head at me that I began to see the effect it has. While waiting at a stoplight, a gentleman collecting funds for an organization tapped on my windshield and pointed to his bucket. I politely smiled and said no thank you, to which he angrily pounded his fist on my window while cluthching a coin and said "it's just a penny!" I shook my head no again and he begrudgingly walked away. I was flustered for about a second until I clearly heard God say, isn't that what you do when you assume people don't care because they don't give where you give, or go where you go, or aren't as passionate about the things I have made you passionate about? Like a ton of bricks crashing to the ground, my heart fell. "But that's not what I was doing God? I just want people to be inspired to go, give, serve- anywhere, not just where I am?" To which God said, "Are you sure?" Truth. I couldn't be sure.

Absolutely my heart screams for the least of these, and more than anything I want us as Christians to love others as the Bible calls us too, but the lesson I learned that day was that having a critical spirit is not the answer. That day reminded me of Jesus while hanging on the cross. Despite what he had just endured, He simply said "Forgive them father, for they do not know what they are doing." Luke 30:34 NIV

Forgive me Father. I am just a dumb sheep trying to make a difference. Thank you for your grace and for always showing me where I fall short, while pointing me back to the narrow path. May we lovingly but with persistance and passion-encourage, inspire and more importantly live a life of selflessness that needs no explanation, but leaves instead a mark and a legacy that screams to others-I want to serve that way too.




Through Their Eyes







Munchkin Land Designs
Papers by Laura Deacetis